When the spoilers for Return to Ravnica started with a slew of powerful-looking Golgari cards that appeared to slot right in to existing Zombies decks, the early debates were all centered on whether RB, GB or Jund would be the way to go, and cards like [card]Lotleth Troll[/card] were obscenely expensive early in the preorder process.
Just over a month into the new Standard environment and those fears of a Zombie-dominated meta have not meta-realised (sorry). Also not making an appearance is the traditional new-meta powerhouse, Red Deck Wins. The main reason for both of these absences (although the lack of good cheap burn is a large factor for RDW) is that there is way too much good lifegain. All the 2-power one-drops in the world won’t help you when my turn 3 play gains me 3 life and effectively blocks all your dudes. When I play something even bigger on turn 5 that gains me FIVE life (presuming I didn’t play a total stop sign on turn 4 that doubles that to ten), what is the Zombies deck going to do?
Concede, generally.
I’ve been enamoured with [card]Rhox Faithmender[/card] for a while now, but even more so recently with my co-host Travis raving about his exploits with lifegain online. Since [card]Thragtusk[/card] is so ubiquitous right now, it seemed like I either had to play it or come up with a way to beat it. With so many of my achievements revolving around lifegain, I decided to head in that direction this week.
Battle Plan
You’ll notice that I have a lot more targets this week, and that I am listing them before talking about the deck. I want to try doing the entire process this way around to see if it’s more fun and more challenging. I took to Twitter on Wednesday to see what the masses could come up with, and they didn’t disappoint. My card choices will be driven by their suggestions!
Target 1: Blink an [card]Armada Wurm[/card] with [card]Trostani, Selesnya’s Voice[/card] in play
Well that means playing both [card]Armada Wurm[/card] and Trostani, which to be fair was likely anyway. It also means I need some sort of blink effect: [card]Deadeye Navigator[/card], [card]Conjurer’s Closet[/card] and [card]Restoration Angel[/card] being the most likely. Angel would gain me 14 life instead of 10, but that seems rather excessive.
Target 2: Have a triple-digit life total
Trostani and [card]Rhox Faithmender[/card] will certainly help here, though I’m going to miss [card]Pristine Talisman[/card]. Other likely candidates are [card]Thragtusk[/card], [card]Centaur Healer[/card] and [card]Drogskol Reaver[/card]. Probably the best way to do this is to play a [card]Serra Avatar[/card] at 50 life with Trostani in play, which is just hilarious. Pairing a [card]Thragtusk[/card] with a [card]Deadeye Navigator[/card] would make this pretty easy too.
Target 3: Attack for more than 100 damage in one combat step
If we’re going to play [card]Serra Avatar[/card] (and I think we pretty much have to at this point), this seems a lot easier. Initially when this achievement was suggested I thought of [card]Craterhoof Behemoth[/card] (also funny with [card]Deadeye Navigator[/card] by the way), but the Avatar can play that game too. I suppose we can also theoretically do this by blinking [card]Thragtusk[/card] a lot and making a ton of Beast tokens, but that might take a while.
Target 4: Win in 1 (due to gaining too much life)
This is of course very possible, though I am not keen on intentionally dragging a game out to make sure there isn’t a completed game 2. As an achievement it’s not one I’d feel comfortable TRYING to get, but if it happens organically that’s fine. Probably won’t accept it though.
Target 5: Blink a [card]Restoration Angel[/card] to blink a Thragtusk
Well this means we HAVE to play something other than just [card]Restoration Angel[/card]. Deadeye gives us repeatable blink in a turn, but also means our mana requirements are all over the place. [card]Conjurer’s Closet[/card] is a lot easier to cast but also easier to remove for some decks and easier to work around. I think I have to play both, but I’m not sure what the split should be.
Target 6: Get a kill with Chalice of Death
This one required absolutely no convincing. [card]Chalice of Life[/card] is one of my pet cards, and the foil looks SWEET. Since we’re apparently gaining ALL the life here, flipping this bad boy seems remarkably easy. Killing with it is then simply a matter of time. Incidentally, gaining stupid amounts of life tends to grant you lots of time.
OK, that’s a good few achievement targets to aim at. We’re starting to put a list together now. We want to gain a ton of life and use it for various powerful things, so where does that lead us?
Weapon Selection
We already know we want [card]Thragtusk[/card], [card]Centaur Healer[/card], [card]Rhox Faithmender[/card], [card]Serra Avatar[/card], [card]Chalice of Life[/card], [card]Armada Wurm[/card], [card]Restoration Angel[/card], Trostani and some combination of [card]Deadeye Navigator[/card] and [card]Conjurer’s Closet[/card]. We’re also considering [card]Drogskol Reaver[/card].
A three-colour mana base requiring UUWWWGG would be terrifying in most formats, but in this one we have shocklands, including the UW and GW ones. We probably want at least 3 blue sources in play with our Navigator to enable in-response blinking if we decide to go that route, which also puts some pressure on our ability to populate with Trostani (if we want to do such a thing). As much as I love both Deadeye and ol’ Ghosty McJazzhands, we might have to leave them in the binder this time. That means [card]Conjurer’s Closet[/card] gets a chance at bat.
One thing that jumps out at me while going over this list is that we’re doing precisely nothing with our graveyard. With all the powerful enters-the-battlefield effects we’re messing with AND the ability to populate with Trostani, this might be a good place to try out [card]Seance[/card]. Trostani herself is a poor target but every other creature we’re considering can do work. It’s also a card I was challenged to “break” so let’s add that to the list:
Target 7: Break [card]Seance[/card]
Since “break” is a very subjective term, I will try and get independent verification of whether or not I did actually break the card. I don’t doubt it will do some powerful things in this deck but we’ll see how often it ends up languishing in my deck box after game 1.
Once I started pulling the list together, it became fairly obvious that it was not only bad, but it also just rolled over to Jund. Neither of those things is desirable. As a result I had to cut the [card]Conjurer’s Closet[/card]s for [card]Loxodon Smiter[/card]s, hopefully making me less of a dog to discard and giving me an early threat. This is what I ended up playing:
[deck title=Seance by Chris Lansdell]
[Creatures]
4 Avacyn’s Pilgrm
4 Centaur Healer
2 Loxodon Smiter
2 Trostani, Selesnya’s Voice
4 Restoration Angel
4 Rhox Faithmender
4 Thragtusk
3 Armada Wurm
2 Serra Avatar
1 Angel of Serenity
[/Creautres]
[Spells]
2 Rancor
2 Chalice of Life
2 Seance
[/Spells]
[Lands]
7 Forest
7 Plains
4 Temple Garden
4 Sunpetal Grove
2 Grove of the Guardian
[/Lands]
[Sideboard]
2 Oblivion Ring
3 Pithing Needle
2 Rest in Peace
3 Sundering Growth
3 Thalia, Guardian of Thraben
2 Vitu-Ghazi Guildmage
[/Sideboard]
[/deck]
Even looking at it now, I wonder what the heck I was thinking. As I sat in the newly-renovated side room at Midgard waiting for the event to start, I was pretty sure I was about to go 0-3 drop with this. Well, it wouldn’t be the first time!
The [card]Grove of the Guardian[/card] addition was a last-minute thing over [card]Gavony Township[/card]. I don’t know what made me include it, but I think it might have been the Trostani synergy. So how did this pile do, and how many of my numerous targets would I hit?
War Report
Despite being sure the deck would fail to win, I was kind of looking forward to unlocking some of the achievements I had set myself. There were some fun possibilities in the deck for sure, and more than anything I was excited to be playing with [card]Seance[/card] for the first time.
Round 1 – Stephen Whelan with UWR Midrange
I’m begging someone – anyone – to make up real names for decks instead of this unimaginative claptrap. But I digress. Long-time followers of this column will know that Stephen, known as Mev for reasons yet to be revealed to me, is the luckiest player on earth. He had literally never played the deck before and normally shies away from control-style decks, but somehow he managed to pilot the deck through me in two games. One was at least somewhat close, but because I am apparently stupid I did not board in Thalia. HEY DUMMY.
0-1
Round 2 – Ryan Kielly with Rakdos Rakdos
The exact matchup I was hoping to see a lot of, I was pretty sure I’d be able to walk through this. As it turns out, Rakdos decks playing with things like [card]Rakdos Cackler[/card] and [card]Gore-House Chainwalker[/card] can present a heck of a short clock. That clock gets a LOT shorter when you’re playing actual [card]Rakdos, Lord of Riots[/card]. Ryan swung in with an unleashed [card]Thrill-Kill Assassin[/card], I didn’t want to lose a [card]Thragtusk[/card] to save 2 damage, and then there was a HUGE FREAKING DEMON staring me down. Fortunately I had a Faithmender down and a [card]Restoration Angel[/card] in hand so I could largely ignore the big guy, but it was scary as heck and prevented my [card]Serra Avatar[/card] from being gigantic (and thereby unlocking an achievement). Trostani (making a rare appearance) combined with [card]Grove of the Guardian[/card] took down both games for me.
Ryan is one of our little ninjas, and game 2 gave me a good chance to talk to him about telegraphing. He had 5 mana out and 1 card in hand that he was making very easy to track (not shuffling cards in his hand, playing lands right off the top and so on). It was pretty obvious he was holding Rakdos, and even more so when he started making bad attacks in hopes I would let it through. I blew his mind by telling him that he wasn’t going to be able to cast that Rakdos this turn, then explained how I knew. Hopefully that sticks with him.
1-1
Round 3 – Mike White with Rakdos Zombies
Mike was the guy who beat me in the finals of Game Day just 6 days prior, with the same deck he was playing at FNM. As I was basically playing the antithesis of his deck, I was looking forward to some revenge. Game 1 was a demonstration of what the deck was supposed to do as Mike got out to an early start, got slowed down by [card]Centaur Healer[/card] and then stopped cold by [card]Thragtusk[/card] and [card]Rhox Faithmender[/card].
Game 2 I kept a risky hand with no green sources, but 2 lands and 2 [card]Avacyn’s Pilgrim[/card]…and a Thalia. I brought Thalia in because she is a very good blocker against Zombies, but she can’t do it alone. When I drew my third land (another [card]Plains[/card]…) on 5 life facing down lethal, Thalia was long dead and I was soon to be dead. Gane 3 I had plenty of mana but zero lifegain. A full FOURTEEN creatures in the deck let me gain life, and I drew none of them. I was wondering how I could possibly lose to Zombies…now I know.
1-2
Round 4 – Andrew Connors with Red Deck Wins
Poor Twinja. He’d been having a rough night and now he’s facing the guy who’s trying to gain as much life as possible. This one basically went as you’d expect: he couldn’t kill me fast enough. I did manage to get Séance going in this round, but it didn’t get a chance to do enough before I won. It did show me that it has a lot of value combined with [card]Grove of the Guardian[/card] though, which I definitely didn’t expect. Red decks have some degree of trouble with vigilant 8/8s too, apparently.
2-2
Round 5 – Dawson Gallagher with Rats
You might read that deck name and think it’s terrible. Well, it’s actually pretty good! Aside from Pack, Typhoid and [card]Ravenous Rats[/card], Dawson was also playing [card]Drainpipe Vermin[/card] and Liliana to wreck my hand, [card]Desecration Demon[/card] to be another solid finisher and a good suite of removal. Fortunately I had [card]Loxodon Smiter[/card] when I needed it, and Séance did a TON of work for me once I started discarding [card]Thragtusk[/card]s and [card]Centaur Healer[/card]s. It also helped me keep his [card]Desecration Demon[/card] locked down to the point that I was well over 50 life by the time I ran out of creatures in the graveyard. I did get to blink [card]Armada Wurm[/card] in this match, but sadly Trostani was not in play.
3-2
Aftershocks
Not a single achievement. Nil. None. Zilch. Somehow I managed to get to a winning record (largely on the back of [card]Grove of the Guardian[/card], [card]Seance[/card] and [card]Thragtusk[/card]) and not unlock a single achievement. I did not see that coming. What went wrong? Did I set my sights too high? Did I build the deck wrong?
I think it’s a bit of both. Some aspects of the deck ([card]Seance[/card], [card]Grove of the Guardian[/card]) worked better than I expected, while others ([card]Restoration Angel[/card], [card]Serra Avatar[/card]) didn’t do anywhere near what I wanted. It’s hard to say what Trostani was like since I only had her twice and only Populated once. In trying to hit all the seemingly-related achievements, I jammed what could have been two different decks into one and diluted the strength of both. This is a classic deckbuilding error – lacking focus. I think the Avatars and the [card]Angel of Serenity[/card] should have been either more ramp or main deck [card]Oblivion Ring[/card]s. [card]Vitu-Ghazi Guildmage[/card] might not have been terrible in the main deck either, being an army in a can and all that.
With none of the achievements being hit this week, they will all stay on the list. That list should be a visible thing very soon, depending on when the artist involved has some time.
Future Sight
To give you time to suggest achievements for next week’s article, I’m going to start letting you know a week in advance what I will be playing at FNM. This will start with the column after next week. So, my main target for the FNM after next will be…
Kill someone with Vraska’s Assassin token
I built a GB midrange deck for Game Day and it was really fun to play. I want to run it back at FNM with some changes and see how it can do. Some of the cards I want to include: [card]Desecration Demon[/card], [card]Liliana of the Dark Realms[/card], [card]Garruk Relentless[/card], [card]Garruk, Primal Hunter[/card], [card]Disciple of Bolas[/card]. Let’s hear those suggestions!
This week I made a guest appearance on the Kitchen Finks podcast to talk about, amongst other things, my article series. It was a fun time and I recommend you all check it out. While I was on there, they gave me a couple of suggestions that I thoroughly enjoyed:
Kill someone with damage from [card]Flayer of the Hatebound[/card]: You might remember I built a Flayer deck a few months ago that also ran Elesh Norn and Gisela in a reanimation shell. That deck tried to make [card]Grimoire of the Dead[/card] playable. It failed at that but did very well otherwise, and was tremendous fun to play. Building it again with cards like [card]Pack Rat[/card] available to me sounds like a real blast.
Win a game after resolving [card]Tibalt, the Fiend-Blooded[/card] and using him at least twice: Ugh. I was in two minds about accepting this one, but I’ve been working like a fiend to get him to work to some degree. The funniest thing to do with him would be to get him up to 6 counters and leave him there, forcing my opponent to hold his creatures or fall victim to…the Tibaltimate.
Thanks for joining me again this week folks! Don’t forget to hit me up with suggestions and feedback in the comments section, and to try out the decks and achievements yourself. These articles are meant to be fun for everyone, and the more people that take part the more fun it will be!
Chris is a deck brewer, podcaster and lover of bacon. He’s recently realised he isn’t completely terrible at this game.